Monday, February 20, 2012

Single and complete okay with it

I couldn't think of a good topic to write about tonight, so I asked a friend. She told me write about something you know about and she suggested to not write about fitness for once. Of course, I laughed at that because the things I know most about are fitness, nutrition and how to train for my next tough mudder. Then it hit me like a load of bricks....being single is also something I know a lot about!

I never dreamed my life would be where it is today. I always had a vision in my head that I would have already had my fairy tale wedding, a house with a huge wrap around porch and a couple babies running around. With that being said, I am not so sure I would have enjoyed my life I once dreamed of. I don't have the prince charming or the loving little children running around. And to be perfectly honest, I am 100% okay with that. I love my life!

The thing that kills me the most about being single and 31 is how people think I must be miserable. There is this stigma. Seriously, why does anyone care about how I live my life? I hear all the time "What are you afraid of, you need to stop being so picky and I know this guy who would be perfect for you." What is the big deal? Why can't I be picky and why should I be afraid of the life I chose to live?

As a women, you are expected to one day have a husband and make babies. Men are expected to work and provided for that family. Those were the old rules! Times have changed and it is okay to be in your 30s and single.

Everyone thinks because I am single, I must be depressed or feel alone all the time. That is totally not the case. I am not depressed and I never feel alone. I am able to do the things I want to do and the only person I have to answer to is myself! I couldn't think of a better life. But so many people want me to have that feeling, a husband.. I get it.

But where does one meet a guy in their 30's? It is not an easy task to do! I don't want to meet a guy at a bar, I don't feel right talking to the cute guy in the grocery store and I certainly am not going to go out with a guy I work with. So what do you do?

I have tried online dating, I have tried going out with friends friends, I have done it all. The answer to my question is easy.. you don't do anything. I believe if you are happy with your life, then happiness will find you. I don't need to run around town looking for a man to complete me. I already feel complete in my life. I am independent, I am happy and am completely okay with it.

As long as you can honestly say that the life you are living is the one you're happy with, nothing else matters. There are no rules to say that you can't change things in the future should you want to but neither is it against the law to be perfectly happy to continue with singledom for the rest of your life. There are many benefits to the life I and other singles have. I get the whole bed to myself, (sort of Louie my dog hogs my bed) I can go out at the drop of a hat without requiring anyone's permission or approval, I can be as grumpy as I please in a morning/afternoon/evening without upsetting anybody else and there's less washing... to name but a few benefits. Sure it can be lonely sometimes but honestly, the loneliest I have ever been was whilst IN a relationship.

It's a tough and brave choice at times to be single in your 30's but I'd rather that than have the pressure of living up to the expectations of society. I have nothing expected of me and that, let me tell you is fabulous!!

No comments:

Post a Comment